5.06.2014

Get Up Out My Nose

I have a problem friends. Bugs are always flying into my nose. I first noticed this a few months ago in Thailand when 3, 3! small bugs in a row flew into my nose.  Then, upon inspecting it, I realized, my nostrils must look like very nice, bug sized caverns to explore. Except they're not. 
source No, No I will not post a picture of my nostrils. Because once I do it, you won't be able to unsee it. But fine! Okay, if you insist, have a look here. 8th picture down, observe the caverns. Now erase them from your brain!
Since discovering this blessing of nose caverns I have, I have had numerous occasions of nose diving by some beloved bugs that inevitably met their death. It's not fun people. For the bugs or me. 
These nostrils of mine, really, why are they so big, God?! It's not something I've really noticed or cared about until now, but now that I have, really, why? And you know, I've done my best to not stretch them out. When I pick my nose, (Don't lie. You know you do it.) I always try to press my nostrils back down so as to ensure they're not getting stretched out.  And I try hard to not flare my nostrils when talking. But, well, according to my dear, precious friend, Catherine,  I always flare my nose, so that's not helping the nostril cave problem. 
Also, I've heard, that your nose and ears never stop growing. So, by the time I'm 60 I'm gonna have huge pits for nostrils, just welcoming any bug who happens to fly by!
Maybe I should put some bug spray up in there. Or invent some nostril nets of different sizes, because you know, I'll need the XL sizes come 60. 
Turns out they already have some for horses. Any way I could make this look stylish? 
I mean if this,
 source
and this are cool for runway, surely, just surely, I could get away with a rockin' bedazzled nostril net or something. 
Anyone else with this problem? 
Got any life saving inventions?! 
I got it, a nose bug spray, that smells good, and doesn't poison you! Brilliant. 
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